bleh

tried to paint myself.
well i guess i need to practice more.

conrad roset

Just a few of Conrad Roset's paintings that I honestly adore so much. I tried making art works somehow similar to that but obviously it's a complete failure. 

His website:

http://conradroset.com/

suppose to end it all

         For my readers and friends, thank you for checking out my blog, I never knew it would get much views without promoting my blog that much. I was going to stop blogging because my blog wasn't accepted for my AdSense account which is a real bummer for me. I think I'll go on blogging to somehow express myself in some way rather than just lying in my bed sulking, just waiting for a miracle to happen. 

          I won't lie I've been pretty lost and depressed the following weeks because of some reasons I don't really want to further explain but it made me realize that I should be a little bit optimistic. I've been the pessimist for my whole life and I think I should honestly change that. For 18 years I thought I don't belong in this place, like my life is in some other place just waiting for it to happen. I know I'm not guna leave this place anytime sooner so why not make the most out of it, I only have one life one chance of being happy.fuck those who try to bring me down, just remember "I can always forget you". block you from facebook.delete your number. and it's as easy as that.

I WILL BE RENEWED.

coffee shops

           I'm the type of person who's slightly obsessed with coffee, and I obviously love coffee shops. I've been to Starbucks lately and it's always been full and noisy, don't get me wrong I'm no anti-social person but I always had this image in my head that coffee shops are quiet and with less people. I guess coffee shops got too popular now it's like everyone's hang out place. You know those annoying loud laughter from girls or their loud voice, surely irritates me. It's not that I'm always annoyed with those kind of noise, it's just that I go to coffee shops for that aura I imagine in my head to just space out as the jazz music plays in the background of the shop. Now the only place I'd rather go to are libraries or book shops, browse through unpacked books and waste my time there. I always love my alone time, yes I also have too much alone time in my room but somehow it's not the same as when you go to public places like malls. Just the thought of you being alone in a room full of people somehow calms me in some way I can't really actually explain. Maybe it's like a fulfillment of your own independence, without having to ask someone to accompany you, you're just there, wanting some alone time. When I'm in Europe hopefully working there, I'd want to go to coffee shops and no not that term where dutch people use to describe weed smoking shit as coffee shops, trust me I've seen one wanted to go in thinking it was just a normal "cafe". I would have my alone time there, and again I dream to fall in love at a coffee shop like the song "Falling in Love at a cofee shop by Landon Pigg". I swear just listening to the song makes you want to have fallen in love at a coffee shop. So I'll stop here.

credits to Michiko Gandionco for taking the picture and my hand for being the model.lol. and of course for starbucks for giving us free drinks.

Junk of the Heart

THE KOOKS: Junk of the Heart (2011-Album)


    I totally adore the Kooks since like long before I don't really know, I was probably in high school when I first heard their album and I just totally fell in love with them plus I'm a sucker for British singers. 
I wish so bad that I could see them play live, which I think wouldn't happen any time soon. 
I think I've been listening to this album almost everyday now.


List of my Favorite songs from this album:
1. Fuck the World Off
2. Taking Pictures of You
3. Eskimo Kisses
4. Runaway
5. or just download the whole album it's gunna be totally worth it

FIRST TIME I SAID 'NO' IT'S LIKE I NEVER SAID 'YES'

          You know that feeling where you play as that really nice person always saying "yes" to other people, then just for once and i repeat once you say "no" because you had it with helping people who are so ungrateful of your help and support and being taken advantage of. I can really tell when someone is so ungrateful, they're there when they need your help and then they suddenly vanish when they're better off.

           I've been used, I won't lie and I was well aware of that but my conscience just told me to help other people since I thought I would have good karma, who knows maybe I will get good karma probably not now but maybe in the future. But I have to be honest, I'm kind of filled up to the brim with this issue, like I mean seriously don't I deserve better?

ANCHORS AWAY

   

     When I first saw this picture, I knew I just have to get a tattoo exactly like it. I don't know when and I don't know how but I will somehow even if my parents would completely disapprove of me having tattoos.

     I know anchor tattoos are so cliche, but it just symbolizes so much that I've gone through in life. The way the anchor is pierced through your skin reminds me of all the pain I've had for like my whole life and how the anchor "brings you down", it's just what I need to be permanently drawn on my skin. It would be a reminder to myself that I've survived the pains of life and how I would not let anything bring me down. Sometimes you need to be reminded of how you've survived the past to still go on with your future. Another reason why I want an anchor tattoo is that I have this adoration with boats and seas, I guess I got that from my father since he's a captain and diver, which I also am. There's really nothing better to clear your mind than to feel the sea breeze and see the horizon that divides the sky and sea.

          I have a feeling I'm going to get this tattoo after college so I won't get into much trouble with my parents. Wish me luck.I guess.

A school friend made this painting of me a year ago.
I think it's adorable.

OLD DOODLES

Before I got into Art school, I just drew doodles, never those realistic drawings and I never even painted much. I was much into just simple drawings and merging them together to create a whole new image. It was a style I was really into before but now I barely know how to doodle like that. At least I can just look at my notebooks and keep what I made before.